Try as I might I often feel as if I don't do things well enough. I'm not really great at anything. I just do stuff. I enjoy the things I do, but I hardly do anything well enough to do it justice.
I'm horrible at housekeeping skills. Can not sew for anything. Not that great of a cook. I love crafting and creating, but don't produce anything magnificent. I love photography, but I'm average. I'm a wife and mom, but I'm not sure I do either well enough to give those titles justice. I try, but my inner doubts leaving me feeling like I'm just subpar. Does everyone feel this way? Somehow I doubt it. There are some people that are really great at everything they do. There are others that are really great at one thing and they focus on that thing, sometimes to the exclusion of everything else, including the people around them. But they bring to that ONE thing the justice it deserves. I do many different things, but I have yet to find something that that I just do really great and feel justified in using a title or word that says "this is what I am" or "this is what I do". I still continue to do the things I like to do, and most of the time I just stay in my happy place, but sometimes it seems like an exercise in futility and I look around me and think why do I bother? My feeble attempts to create something, be something, do something, seem rather silly at times. If I don't do it well enough to give it justice, then what is the point? I guess there really isn't one. We're only here for a short while, really just a blink in a small moment of time. Maybe some of us are here just to give existing justice. Maybe I'm one of the ones that was meant to admire the works of the ones that do give justice to their respective works. Maybe one day a light bulb will flicker to life and I'll discover my one thing I can do justice to. Or maybe I'll just keep being great at being average.
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